OCWeekly February 18, 2016 : Page 7

¡ask a mexican! » » GUSTAVO ARELLANO DEAR MEXICAN: I’m a misplaced half-Mexican in Missis-sippi, of all places. The area I live in is WHITE as WHITE can be—and has been for many foreign-hating years. I’ve been in MS for almost four years and have seen the Latin community more than double. This makes me feel more at ease since a diverse culture is what I’m used to; I spent my first 23 years in California. My dilemma is that I find two different kinds of Latins (mostly Mexicans and Guatemalans). They are either really friendly and relieved to see another brownie or NOT really that accepting. I am half-beaner—my dad is from Mexico; I have the dark skin, curly hair, hips and ass to prove it. Problem is, I wasn’t raised a Mexican, my dad never taught me Spanish, and I never had anything but a white neighborhood and white friends. How can I get my brown homies in this WHITE town to accept my white-raised side, too? I feel misplaced because the whites here think I’m another “border jump-ing, job-stealing” Mexican, while the Latins think I’m a tanned whitey who hates them. We should be sticking together, right? The Confused Coconut DEAR POCHO : First thing’s primeramente : Drop the “Latins” moniker. That hasn’t been used to describe Mexis since the days when baseball writers referred to Roberto Clemente as “Bob.” But having traveled through the Magnolia State—I’ve enjoyed Delta tamales in Greenville, tried a so-so burrito in Iuka and lectured about Mexicans in the South during the fabulous South-ern Foodways Symposium at the University of Mississippi—I hate to say this truth: Racist good ol’ boys are sooner to accept you than Mexicans. Mexicans have shunned other Mexicans since the days when the Tlaxcalans and Totonacs sided with Cortés against the Aztecs. Gabachos ? Yeah, they hate us, but all you have to do to get accepted by them is open a Mexican restaurant. It doesn’t matter if it sucks; you’ll mesmerize them into submission like a gato with catnip. DEAR MEXICAN: I had an affair with a younger Mexican co-worker. I warned him not to get attached, as I was married, and then I didn’t follow my own advice. In the end, I made the mistake of asking what his brother would think if he knew about us, and he ended the relationship because he realized his whole family would be disappointed. The problem is, he means a lot to me and made me feel so good. How could he call me her-mosa and preciosa , tell me I was perfect— then end it? I realize family is very important to him, but he knew what we were getting into from the start. Is there a way to get him back, or should I give up? Is that family bond, which I’ve witnessed seems to be a very Mexican thing, strong enough that now that it’s clicked with him, there’s no going back? La Preciosa DEAR GABACHA : So you’re telling me that you’re mad at a Mexican because he did what you asked—that is, you invited him in but asked him to not be attached, and he wasn’t, and now you’re sad? That’s just like the United States asking Mexico to send over men during the Bracero Pro-gram in the 1950s, but asking them not to become American—and then Americans were shocked that Mexicans remain Mexican. Comal , meet olla . ASK THE MEXICAN at themexican@askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter, or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano! CONTENTS | the THE county COUNTY | feature FEATURE | calendar CALENDAR | food FOOD | film FILM | culture CULTURE | music MUSIC | classifieds CLASSIFIEDS | | contents GEM FAIRE JEWELRY REPAIR while you shop The Largest Jewelry & Bead Show in So CA! COSTA MESA OC Fair & Event Center 88 Fair Dr., Costa Mesa JEWELRY CRYSTALS FEBRUARY 26, 27, 28 Friday 12pm-6pm Saturday 10am-6pm Sunday 10am-5pm GENERAL ADMISSION $7 WEEKEND PASS GEMS BEADS SILVER Free hourly door prizes Classes & demonstrations Largest selection • New Vendors! *CLIP & BRING THIS AD TO RECEIVE ONE (1) FREE ADMISSION *Not valid with other offer. One coupon per person. Property of Gem Faire, Inc. Can be revoked without notice. Non-transferrable. MINERALS FOSSILS Sponsored by GEM FAIRE, INC. (503) 252-8300 GEMFAIRE.COM Type II Diabetes? Are you having trouble controlling your Type II Diabetes despite current treatment? If so, consider participating in a clinical research study. CNS is currently conducting a clinical research study of an investigational medication for Type II Diabetes . Qualified participants receive study-related medical care and investigational medication at no cost and may be compensated for time and travel. www.cnstrial.com/diabetes H EY Y OU ! » ANONYMOUS February 19-25, 2014 2016 MONTH XX–XX, I Tank Half-Full t was another lovely day in the offi ce when I over-heard your tirade about gas prices, stock markets and interest rates. It was diffi cult to ascertain your voice over the sounds of the Black Lips, but after getting closer, I KNEW that whine. I guess your little hybrid is not effective in off-setting the cost of running six air conditioners this sum-mer at your 15,000-square-foot hacienda or maintaining the staff at your vacation waterfront BOB AUL estate. I felt horrible for you, watching the stock mar-ket lose precious points in the past weeks. This certainly will cut into the $650,000 in passive interest, dividends and rental receipts you stash away each month. I worry for you. Maybe you can travel by single-engine prop to Europe and refuel in Bermuda. I think the Bermuda Triangle would be a lovely spot for you and the Mrs. We’ll pass the hat to help refuel the jet. Better check the tanks yourself; some of your staff suggested fi lling it halfway. OCWEEKLY.COM | | ocweekly.com HEY, YOU! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations—changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to “Hey, You!” c/o OC Weekly , 3420 Bristol St., 6th Floor, Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or email us at letters@ocweekly.com. 844-213-3337 7 3

¡Ask A Mexican!

Gustavo Arellano

¡ask a mexican!

DEAR MEXICAN: I’m a misplaced half- Mexican in Mississippi, of all places. The area I live in is WHITE as WHITE can be—and has been for many foreign-hating years. I’ve been in MS for almost four years and have seen the Latin community more than double. This makes me feel more at ease since a diverse culture is what I’m used to; I spent my first 23 years in California. My dilemma is that I find two different kinds of Latins (mostly Mexicans and Guatemalans). They are either really friendly and relieved to see another brownie or NOT really that accepting. I am half-beaner—my dad is from Mexico; I have the dark skin, curly hair, hips and ass to prove it. Problem is, I wasn’t raised a Mexican, my dad never taught me Spanish, and I never had anything but a white neighborhood and white friends. How can I get my brown homies in this WHITE town to accept my white-raised side, too? I feel misplaced because the whites here think I’m another “border jumping, job-stealing” Mexican, while the Latins think I’m a tanned whitey who hates them. We should be sticking together, right?

The Confused Coconut

DEAR POCHO: First thing’s primeramente: Drop the “Latins” moniker. That hasn’t been used to describe Mexis since the days when baseball writers referred to Roberto Clemente as “Bob.” But having traveled through the Magnolia State—I’ve enjoyed Delta tamales in Greenville, tried a so-so burrito in Iuka and lectured about Mexicans in the South during the fabulous Southern Foodways Symposium at the University of Mississippi—I hate to say this truth: Racist good ol’ boys are sooner to accept you than Mexicans. Mexicans have shunned other Mexicans since the days when the Tlaxcalans and Totonacs sided with Cortés against the Aztecs. Gabachos? Yeah, they hate us, but all you have to do to get accepted by them is open a Mexican restaurant. It doesn’t matter if it sucks; you’ll mesmerize them into submission like a gato with catnip.

DEAR MEXICAN: I had an affair with a younger Mexican co-worker. I warned him not to get attached, as I was married, and then I didn’t follow my own advice. In the end, I made the mistake of asking what his brother would think if he knew about us, and he ended the relationship because he realized his whole family would be disappointed. The problem is, he means a lot to me and made me feel so good. How could he call me hermosa and preciosa, tell me I was perfect— then end it? I realize family is very important to him, but he knew what we were getting into from the start. Is there a way to get him back, or should I give up? Is that family bond, which I’ve witnessed seems to be a very Mexican thing, strong enough that now that it’s clicked with him, there’s no going back? La Preciosa

DEAR GABACHA: So you’re telling me that you’re mad at a Mexican because he did what you asked—that is, you invited him in but asked him to not be attached, and he wasn’t, and now you’re sad? That’s just like the United States asking Mexico to send over men during the Bracero Program in the 1950s, but asking them not to become American—and then Americans were shocked that Mexicans remain Mexican. Comal, meet olla.

ASK THE MEXICAN at themexican@askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter, or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

Read the full article at http://digitalissue.ocweekly.com/article/%C2%A1Ask+A+Mexican%21/2400654/291124/article.html.

Hey, You!

Anonymous

Tank Half-Full

It was another lovely day in the office when I overheard your tirade about gas prices, stock markets and interest rates. It was difficult to ascertain your voice over the sounds of the Black Lips, but after getting closer, I KNEW that whine. I guess your little hybrid is not effective in off-setting the cost of running six air conditioners this summer at your 15,000-square-foot hacienda or maintaining the staff at your vacation waterfront estate. I felt horrible for you, watching the stock market lose precious points in the past weeks. This certainly will cut into the $650,000 in passive interest, dividends and rental receipts you stash away each month. I worry for you. Maybe you can travel by single-engine prop to Europe and refuel in Bermuda. I think the Bermuda Triangle would be a lovely spot for you and the Mrs. We’ll pass the hat to help refuel the jet. Better check the tanks yourself; some of your staff suggested filling it halfway.

HEY, YOU! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations—changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to “Hey, You!” c/o OC Weekly, 3420 Bristol St., 6th Floor, Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or email us at letters@ocweekly.com.

Read the full article at http://digitalissue.ocweekly.com/article/Hey%2C+You%21/2400659/291124/article.html.

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